This is a special story for our family and close to our hearts as this journey has had it’s up and downs. It’s definitely not gone the way we planned, but are grateful for the way the Lord has guided us through it. I always dreamed of being a mother one day and it has always been a desire of mine. I trusted God with His perfect timing, but this journey did not go as we expected it to.
In July 2021, we had found out we were pregnant and weren’t trying. We were so excited and nervous and didn’t know how we felt about it. At the time, we had talked about being married another couple years before having children and it wasn’t in our plan, but God had a greater plan. When we found out at the doctors they confirmed I was 6 weeks along. I had started to feel some pregnancy symptoms, but didn’t feel very pregnant. I had an ultrasound scheduled for 8/9 weeks with expectations that everything would be just fine. When we went into that appointment with hopeful hearts, we got the worst news we possibly could and it turned into a really tragic day. The midwife did an ultrasound and really had a hard time finding the baby and heartbeat so she sent me to an ultrasound tech at the hospital. As we went through this ultrasound, the tech was very quiet and we kept wondering what was going on. We later got a call that day from the midwife, saying that they found a gestational sac that was measuring 6 weeks but they found no heartbeat. At the moment time stood still as we processed the fact that we had lost our baby and were going to have a miscarriage. My midwife told me to wait for sure to do anything to make sure I wasn’t behind with dating the baby’s age as that can happen. So we cried and mourned as we thought we were losing our baby but we were also hopeful that maybe this wouldn’t be our story. A few days later, I started bleeding and at that moment I knew….our baby was gone. The following weekend, my younger sister was coming into town to go to hershey park with us and I thought I would be fine by this point. This is when it got worse, while at the park that day I had several contractions that were worse than period cramps and felt terrible, but I pushed through the day. The pain started to get worse and as I sat at the starbucks in the park watching the last roller coaster that my husband and sister rode I felt terrible pain and ran to the restroom. That was the moment I had truly lost our baby. So not only was I in so much physical pain but I also was experiencing the worst emotional pain I have ever felt. I truly didn’t know I wanted to be a mom till after experiencing all of this.
After going through lots of grieving and time to process our emotions, I met with a reproductive endocrinologist who did some tests on me. They found that I had a uterine anomaly called a uterine septum. It’s basically a formation to the top of the uterus that makes it hard for a baby to survive and have enough room in there. Thankfully through all of the testing, I was able to have a surgery performed called a hysteroscopy to fix my uterus. So we decided to go ahead with the surgery in late February of 2022. The surgery was successful and I was cleared.
Grief is a really difficult thing to go through and both my husband and I were still processing all of the emotions. We wanted to still have children but were scared of having them to go through a similar situation like we did before. We had to trust God, especially me.
God’s timing is perfect…
We were building a house in 2022 and it was finally finished in August 2022. I had also gone through some mental health issues in June of 2022 that I needed to work out through counseling etc. I remember praying and talking to God in September 2022 and just giving him my desire to have kids. Fast forward to late September and a couple days before my monthly cycle came, I decided to take a test….that test was negative but I decided to not give up hope. I took another test on the day my monthly cycle was supposed to come and it was positive!! I got so excited but was also still in disbelief that it had happened, but two days later I took another one and it was positive again! I was so incredibly excited and I told Corbin the first time I got the positive test and he got so excited after I confirmed it for sure the following two days. We both knew that it was God’s timing and continued to pray for a healthy pregnancy.
The first few two months were scary for us at first and we didn’t feel connected to the baby because of our prior loss. We continued to have faith and hope and trust God and pray lots. Every appointment went so well and the baby had a strong heartbeat since week 6. Fast forward we finally got to week 11 and had a great ultrasound and our baby was doing so well. Once we finally reached 20 weeks, it became very real to my husband and I that we were having a baby and it was very healthy….oh and we found out we were having a girl!! We are now 27 weeks and we can’t wait to meet our little baby girl in June!